Bad Therapy Step 3: Make "Happiness" a Goal but Reward Emotional Suffering.

Quotes from Bad Therapy:

Hang around families with young children for an afternoon, and you'll hear parents check that their kids are enjoying their ice cream, excited about school the next day, that they had fun at the park. In so many ways, we signal to kids: your happiness is the ultimate goal; it's what we're all livin' for.

According to the best research, we have it all backward. If we wanted our kids to be happy, the last thing we would do is to communicate that happiness is the goal. The more vigorously you hunt happiness, the more likely you are to be disappointed. This is true irrespective of the objective conditions of your life.

This is so true in Islam. We are constantly reminded of how this world is a delusion, a fleeting moment that will only be like a night followed by the day:

On the Day they see it, it will seem they lingered [in this life] an evening [at most,] or its morning. (79:46)

Just look at social media. Everyone seems happy, except you, and it artificially makes you sad and depressed. If social media is doing this to adults, who have a more mature brain and life experience, how about teenagers and youngsters who are not as mature?

By insisting that happiness be their goal, we place kids in a crucible. On the one hand, "chasing positivity" tends to make them more depressed. Then feeling depressed gets socially rewarded.”

Here’s an anecdote from a high school kid regarding being known by your strengths vs being known for your struggles.

Cody, a senior at a public high school in Brooklyn, told me the same. A generation ago, kids might have identified with what Cody calls their "strengths": the jock, the popular kid, the math team member, the beauty queen. But today, that's verboten. "Identifying with your strengths now isn't seen as too cool because some people may manipulate you into thinking that you're privileged because of it."

What's wrong with identifying with your struggles? "Well, I see that they don't try to solve it."

Cody took pains to explain that he wasn't talking about the severely depressed —just the average kid. Once they get the validation from other students for their mental health crises, "they don't break out of that rut," he said.

In conclusion, if you pursue happiness, you will only be more depressed, which is praised and pampered by society, leaving you in that state since it makes you feel “accepted.”

Everlasting happiness is only in Jannah, and to get to Jannah requires struggle and sacrifice.